


Technoblade and Philza fuck with a Pickle

by WilburWillyWonker



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, M/M, Other, Philza fucks Technoblade with a pickle, Philza walks in, Technoblade fucks himself with a pickle, Then he eats the cumcickle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 16:34:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30058368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WilburWillyWonker/pseuds/WilburWillyWonker
Summary: Technoblade fucks himself with a pickle, but Philza walks in.
Relationships: Technoblade/Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 37
Kudos: 76





	Technoblade and Philza fuck with a Pickle

Technoblade had been in many situations before, situations where the urges would always be overwhelming. The urge to slaughter, the urge to destroy, and in this case the urge to fuck himself with a pickle.

With an unsteady hand his fingers wrap around the pickles rough, lumpy surface. In some ways it resembles a dick, so maybe Technoblade could pull this off.

His fingers just weren't doing it for him, so while he continues to scissor himself, Technoblade raises the sexy and throbbing vegetable to his lips, parting them and deepthroating the pickle whole. It's smooth but irregular surface grinds against his cheeks, and Technoblade resists the urge to bite down and eat it. 

The surface of the vegetable itself could only be described as a road that has been potholed. His tongue wetting the lumpy vege-cock.

After an optimal amount of sucking and preparation he guides the pickle to his stretched hole, shoving it in without hesitation. Technoblade bites his hand to stifle the moan that slips out, tasting blood mix into his  
pickle breath.

He thrusts it in with relentless speed, the pickle finding places inside him his fingers could never reach.

—

Philza breathes out a tired sigh, shrugging his coat and tossing it onto his couch. After a long day's work all he could think of was crawling under the sheets and cuddle with his husband.

The house is unusually silent, Philza would've expected Technoblade to be by the fireplace like he always is. Shrugging it off as his husband being tired he makes his way to the bedroom. 

Philza pauses outside the door, hearing muffled noises from inside. His mind immediately jumps to the worst and he kicks the door open, charging inside with murder on his mind.

He certainly didn't expect to see his husband with a pickle up his fucking ass.

"Philza?! W-what are you doing back so soon?" Technoblade stammers as he scrambles up, pulling the pickle out of his ass and trying to hide it behind his back.

It takes Philza a bit to process what he just witnessed. But his dick seemed to like it, twitching from the scene that just played out. A small smirk tugs at his lips as he takes deliberate and slow strides over to his husband.

Technoblade is blushing furiously, refusing to make contact.

"Fucking yourself with a pickle because I wasn't here? How slutty of you~" Philza crawls onto the bed with him, "hand me the pickle."

Technoblade pauses, probably from surprise, before nodding and handing it over. It's slick with a layer of saliva, and Philza's mouth waters at the apperance.

"Turn around." Technoblade quickly obeys and shuffles around, exposing his ass. Philza then slides the pickle dick back in. Technoblade arches his back with a loud moan, not bothering to hide his noises anymore.

Philza wastes no time, immediately thrusting the pickle deeper inside. Technoblade's legs tremble as his toes curl into the sheets. His moans get louder and he cries out, cumming over the bed.

Philza pulls out the pickle with a sigh of satisfaction. The lumpy surface glistens, the green sparkling to almost resemble a jade. With no hesitation he takes a bite out, the multiple flavours flooding his taste buds.


End file.
